Life is a verse filled with muses. Well, there are plenty of muses to recite but not all of them have something unique to offer about the plot explaining life more frequently. The same thing goes with sex. Everyone loves it when they are showered with it, and one definitely likes the amusing affair.
The idea of sex requires free thinking and the involvement of concepts such as consent, happiness, and acceptability. Not everyone likes to express their hidden desires (It is considered taboo in many cultures) and sex is performed more like a duty than a pleasing need or a route to pleasure (Kyunki, ye sirf Shaadi Ke Baad hi Karte Hain meaning, It is done only after you get married).
Our Indian society has somehow developed a negative behaviour with respect to sex. Everyone loves it more like taking a hit (Smoking weed), but refrain from talking about it (Kyunki, iska use toh sirf bachhe paida karne ke liye hota hai which roughly translates to, It only use is to have kids).
We live in a society honouring the concept of chastity and marriage and ignoring every other choice. No one wants to discuss, how to perform in bed and no one has time to explore pleasure (Kyunki, hame toh aese hi sikhaya gaya hai). The mindset regarding sex needs to be changed and monotony should be broken.
In fact, women (Especially, the married ones) of our society are not even allowed to express their desire for sex. The scene is even worse with rural women. An article in mint explained about the sexual lives of rural women from Maharashtra and Uttar Pradesh. The women amidst the problems of caste, gender, and class crave for pleasure and fulfilling desires.
“Everyone wants it but no one likes to talk about it.”
And if you need to shut down the voices, then bring our culture in between the argument to shut the convincing tone (Which is derogatory to our so-called society).
Sometimes, the culprit is known to be our hectic life and one of the two partners suffering from stress and tiredness (Or sometimes both). One of the other has to sacrifice or drop the idea of lovemaking because we don’t talk enough about it.
One of the renowned and influential speakers, Mathew Hussey in one of his conversation explained about the idea and technicalities around sex that If it is done right, then it’s just the 20% of your relationship, and if not, it’s 80% of your relationship.
So, I believe, sex is a minor part of your love life only when it is done right.
Our most of the problems regarding sex will be solved only if we talk about it enough. And consulting a sexologist won’t bring shame to your name. It’s all about understanding and believing that pleasure is also important (For both of you). Even with pleasure, you need to make sure that you also respect the other gender and also bring the consent and the use of a condom (Kyunki, issey sirf bachhe paida nhi karte; which roughly translates to You don’t do it just to have kids) in your relationship.
The scene regarding sex is so bad that plenty of them don’t even know the process and on getting married are shamed for not being learned enough (It doesn’t matter if the other knows about the concept of orgasm or not).
Again, sex is not bad, but people are. Let’s not be bad and talk about it to end the suffering of long-lost desires and seduce each other with the consent and use a condom (Please).